Look Closely at the Tragedy

To Find the Beauty Within;

Lord I am Thankful.

 

Thankful. Joyful. At Peace.

Here's my past two weeks:

Roommate's declaration of moving out

Rent Due

Anger

Frustration

Finals

Stress

Cousin's Unexpected Death

Funeral

Crying

Hating Job

Best Friend Got Married, Without telling me

Stomach Flu

 

It seemed like the world was crumbling underneath me and everything that could go wrong was going wrong. In these tragedies, I began to see how far I've come. I was being tested and I feel like I passed.

 

Right Now, All I have to say is "Thank you Jesus, Thank you Father, Thank you Holy Spirit! "

 

Tonight, I discussed the rent situation with my friend. I was so torn between legality and a friendship that I forgot what was more important. Relationships are more important than material possessions. True, the rent needs to be paid and there's a contract that was signed. Which we discussed and we came to an agreement that if I couldn't find someone that she was still responsible for the half of the rent until I could find someone. I told her that I would get rid of the internet and I would find a way to pay for utilities since she wasn't living here anyways, so she would just be responsible for her half of the rent. I did this without a harsh word, there was nothing but understanding and I think that we were on the same page. The truth is that I don't want to lose her as a friend, especially when she is having a hard time herself. I'm not one to be selfish, I know that financial struggles are in the works for me if I don't find someone but at the same time I have this feeling that God has my back. I gained this feeling while I was at my cousin's funeral.

 

Speaking of which, my cousin Jamie died unexpectedly last Wednesday. I can't believe it's already been a week. A little background about my cousin, he was one of my musical inspirations. He was so talented and music just flowed out of him. I remember that I wanted to sing with him, I figured that it would be a great memory. It never happened though. He passed away in his early 30s because of a fatal heart attack, he was the same age as my sister. My sister took this especially hard because they grew up together. The funeral was hard, I'm not going to lie. I broke down more than once but somehow his death has helped me look toward my future; my future in music. I have been given new hope and I know that even though I didn't get to sing with him on earth, I know that I will have plenty of time to sing with him.

 

 

I will finish tomorrow possibly. haha I'm tired and I plan on waking up early to study for my Anthro Final & Psych Final tomorrow :/ Goodnight all :)

 

I'm learning that I need to Let Go & Let God

Tiffany -xo.